Joy and the sharing of memories

Yesterday was a day of mixed emotions for me. Joy and sorrow all tangled up together but in the end joy outweighed the sorrow.

Let me give you a bit of background before I fill you in on what I did yesterday.

As I sort through all the "treasures" I have collected over the years I have to make tough decisions whether to take the treasure with me or take only the memories and leave the object behind. Handmade items crafted by loved ones who have passed are the hardest ones to part with. Sigh.

One such item that has really tugged at my heart is a rather large craft project my mother made over twenty years ago. I inherited this craft because Lady Bug had a teddy bear collection at one time, and, when my mom died, my sister thought that Lady Bug should have this item that her grandmother made and treasured. Lady Bug is a traveller and she likes to travel light. While she values this item she has no place for it and probably never will.

My mother was a very creative person, and I remember vividly all her forays into different crafts when I was growing up. During the whipped wax candle phase, we peeled wax off almost every surface in the house. The sequin ribbon Christmas trees were another wild craft that got out of hand; we had bits and pieces of sequin ribbon in every nook and cranny in the house. When we cut that stuff it would shoot like shrapnel all over the room. I would go to school with it in my hair and even find it in my sandwich at lunch. Yuck!

Sparkle dust was another dastardly craft item that would get all over everything, and all us kids would sparkle and glisten long before glitter make-up was even thought of. I wonder what the guys at work said to my dad when he showed up with sparkle dust in his moustache?

My mom took great delight in making something out of nothing. If you had to go out and buy expensive material to make a craft then it wasn't nearly as much fun for her, and for much of her married life she never had extra money to buy craft materials. She would collect egg cartons to make wastebaskets, orange juice tins to make pencil holders, plastic bags to make Poodles (don’t' ask), old greeting cards to make bowls, sequin ribbon to make Christmas trees — you get the idea.

Dear mom hated housework but loved to do her crafts and could sit in the middle of the rubble of a messy house and create beauty out of the "trash" she collected. Amazing really, but the messy house drove me crazy even as a kid. I hated the piles of egg cartons piled in the corners awaiting the transformation process and the rolls of plastic, soon to become Poodles, sitting in the middle of the living room floor. She didn't mind it, or didn't see it, I am not sure which, but she had to create and create she did.

One of her creations and the prized craft that we inherited is a Teddy Bear's Picnic made out of bread dough. Yes, bread dough. I don't know how many hours mom spent on this project, but it is an absolutely amazing piece of art. Each piece was painstakingly made out of bread dough, cooked in the oven, hand painted and arranged in this picnic scene. Every blade of grass, bottle of pop, piece of ice, hamburger, hotdog, sandcastle – is made of bread dough. The only things that aren't bread dough are the mirror used for the water, the paper on the kite, the string on the fishing pole, the lace on some of the bears' dresses, and the paper on the finish line sign.



I have had this sitting on a bookcase under a glass cover for thirteen years. Now that we are moving to a much smaller house on the other side of the province I have to decide what to do with this rather large piece of art. It is over twenty years old now, and rather fragile. Would it even take a move across country?

I woke up last week with the bright idea of contacting the Children's library to see if they would accept it as a donation to be displayed there. Yesterday was my appointment with the curator to talk to her about it. With heart beating a little faster, I walked into the library with mom's treasure and wondered what the librarian would think of it. Much to my delight she was absolutely thrilled with it. She took down all sorts of information about it and said she would tour it to all the other libraries in the county – twenty seven in all. I walked out of the library in a swirl of emotions. It made me sad to leave The Teddy Bear's Picnic behind, but I was also full of joy that it would be on display in the Children's library and enjoyed by so many.

We left the library and went down to the Bay for coffee and a few minutes of quiet by the water. I sat there and let the emotions of the day wash over me. I looked up at the sky and thought of mom and how pleased she would be that her work of art would be on display for the children in this area. It felt good and it felt right.

Joy and sorrow all tangled up together, but, in the end, joy outweighed the sorrow. How wonderful when that happens.

Inner Peace

The packing and sorting continues at our house, but AC and I have made it a priority to get out on the bikes as much as we can these days and enjoy as many trips as possible on these wonderful trails before we move to another part of the country. What a treat it is to ride out to the lake early in the morning and start our hectic days off that way. The ride in the cool morning air clears my head and helps me start my "packing" day on the right foot.

When I have a huge task in front of me I tend to go to bed at night with things that need to be done spinning through my head, and I wake up in the same spin. If I write down what needs to be done, set some time goals and have my plan of attack recorded in black and white on paper, that really helps to slow down the spin of thoughts in my head. So, I make list upon list and am always planning what my next step will be, but some days the lists don't help and I feel overwhelmed by the mountain ahead of me. The only thing for it is to go outside and calm down. Look at the trees, listen to the waves, feel the wind against my face. A ride on the bike does all of this for me.

Just before we set off for our ride the other day I grabbed my bike helmet and noticed that the plastic tension strap on it wouldn't tighten the way it should. I turned to AC and said "I need to go the bike shop and see if I can find a new inner piece."

"Hmmm," he said to me, "who knew that you could get inner peace at the bike shop?"

We laughed about it and set off on our ride. As I rode along I thought about what he said and realized that maybe I couldn't find inner peace at the bike shop, but a ride on my bike was sure helping me find some.
Joys come from simple natural things: mists over meadows, sunlight on leaves, the path of moon over water.
Segrid Olson

Joy does comes from these simple things, and with joy comes peace and release. I look at the mists over the meadows and sunlight on the leaves as we pedal along and feel full of joy.

I hope you find "Inner Peace" on your life's journey today too. Maybe even in a bike shop, or your kitchen or the grocery store.

Butterfly on my shoulder

Ah, sweet relief. This morning the humidity has loosened its grip just a tad and I actually have the windows open. What a treat! Fresh cool air is wafting in the patio door here beside me and once the air meets the fan it swirls around me in the most delightful way. I'm lovin' it

The humidex was in the 40's yesterday, so we stayed put in our air conditioned house and packed boxes. I am happy to report that we have finished the storage room/den area and that feels like a major accomplishment. Next, the basement, but not today, for today we dust off the bikes and head out for a ride. The winds are light and the air cool, so a ride out to the lake is number one on the agenda.

We last rode to the lake on Sunday and at one point we pedalled past a Strawberry field. Oh, I could almost taste the fresh picked wonders because the smell of them was so thick in the air. I had to fight with my bike not to veer off the path and plunge right into that field so I could feast on the bright red gems.

Further along the path we kept being assaulted by the thick rich fragrance of lilacs, but I knew the fragrance wasn't from lilacs because they were all done for the season. I looked around and could see plenty of wildflowers, and wondered which one was imitating the lilac. I soon had the answer to my question, and it had nothing to do with recognizing a flower, and everything to do with seeing a butterfly. Yes, I had a butterfly flit around my head and almost land on my shoulder as I pedalled along. What a gift. The Monarchs are back and that means the Milkweed must be blooming. I couldn't see any, but I could sure smell them. What a beautiful combination- butterflies, the fragrance of Milkweed and a ride out to the lake.

Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.
Nathaniel Hawthorne

He who binds to himself a joy
does the winged life destroy
but he who kisses the joy as it flies
lives in Eternity's sun rise.
William Blake

Whatever you are busy doing these days I hope you find time, or take time, to sit quietly and let happiness alight upon you, and you kiss the joy as it flies.

Daydreams

Does anyone know where Jennifer over at Daydreams went? I can't get into her page at all and I am concerned about her. Jennifer if you read this please contact me and let me know how you are doing.

All the time

Goodness Gina, I do it ALL THE TIME!

If, as you live your life, you find yourself mentally composing blog entries about it, post this exact same sentence in your weblog.

Time for a shower

I was over visiting Katt at Bamboo Shade the other day, and found this quote that reached out and grabbed me.

"Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life".
~Pable Picasso

I am feeling rather dusty and dry in spirit from all the packing I have been doing in this hot humid weather and I long to pick up a paint brush and take a nice long shower. I packed my paints away yesterday and dreamed of opening them up in my new house. What fun it will be to start a new project once I get there. Oh I can almost feel that cool water washing over my spirit already. Just thinking about painting again makes me feel better.

In the meantime a sponge bath of music will have to do. Turn up the volume and splash, splash, splash!

H H H

Hot! Humid! Hazy! Yes it is summer here in Southwestern Ontario and I am melting. Help!

We have the house closed up tight and the air conditioning on during the hottest part of the day, but it still feels like an oven in here when I am up to my ears in cardboard and packing materials. I have fans going full blast in the room where I am working at the moment, but I am still melting and am sure AC is going to come in and find just a puddle on the floor where once I stood.

Time to take a break and cool off a bit. The fan is trained right on me and a tall glass of ice water is at the ready. Ahhhhh, that's better. Let the cardboard and packing material wait for a bit I need to escape for awhile.

I enjoyed my morning coffee out on the front deck this morning and that was good for my spirit. I sat under the shade of the huge Linden tree and drank in the beauty of it along with my coffee. I needed that long refreshing drink that only nature can give me.

At the end of a busy day yesterday we sat out on the back deck and watched fire flies play tag in the flower beds. Ah, another deeply refreshing draft for my spirit.

I hope you find a cool refreshing oasis in the world around you during this heat wave too, and you drink deeply whenever you can.

To sit in the shade on a fine day, and look upon verdure is the most perfect refreshment.
Jane Austen

Ring those bells

Yesterday, when I heard the news about the bombings in London, I was reminded of the day a few years ago when I was listening to a CBC radio program after a horrible car bombing in Israel. The radio reporter was talking to a Jewish lady about this terrible act and he asked her how she managed to go on with everyday activities and not be paralyzed by fear. She quoted words from a song by Leonard Cohen, and they stopped me in my tracks.

Ring the bells that still can ring.
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the life gets in.
Leonard Cohen

She said to the reporter, “You Ring the bells that still can ring and you go on. “

I think of the people in London today and send them my thoughts and prayers. My heart hurts for you and I pray that you will be able to ring the bells that still can ring and find the strength and courage to go on.

Cardboard and Cobwebs II

Yes, that perfectly describes my day yesterday. I was up to my ears in cardboard and cobwebs in the basement ALL day. And do you want to know something? It actually felt pretty good. Amazing huh? I had an encounter with cardboard and cobwebs last year too, and wrote about it here. That was a false start, but this time it is the real deal. Our house has been sold and we have a moving date to meet.

Once I got past the feelings of panic over this move and the mountain of "stuff" I have to sort through and pack, I started to feel a great sense of release and freedom about cleaning things out and downsizing. We road our bikes past the big opulent houses by the lake the other day and I realized that my spirit felt the same way as my body did as we road along. I looked at the big gardens and fancy lawn furniture and pools and I felt as if I was breezing away from all the things I had to dust, wash, paint, cut, weed, oil, trim, deadhead, and generally care for. It made me feel light and free.

This move to a much smaller house with almost no outside maintenance fills me with joy and freedom. I am loving the very thought of going to Riverwood this fall and not facing hours of work getting the house and garden ready to leave. Oh joy!

I have a mountain of work to do between now and moving day on August 29th, but I am finding joy in the anticipation of what I am going to instead of sorrow at what I am leaving behind. I am even enjoying sorting through my "stuff". With each box I send to the Goodwill, I feel like I am giving my girls a gift because I am doing this instead of leaving it for them to do without me one day. You can read about my Pack Rat tendencies here. This sorting and cleaning really needs to happen.

I have really enjoyed this free morning to read blogs and write a bit in the middle of this huge task before me. What a treat. I ran out of boxes yesterday afternoon and the car was in the shop, so we couldn't go get more. We thought we might go out for a bike ride but the sky opened up and rain poured down on us, so a glorious free morning stretched out in front of me like a gift to be unwrapped. I have enjoyed peeling back each piece of tape and ripping off the paper. Alas, it is now almost noon, the car is back from the shop and the day marches forward, so I must put this gift aside and get back to work.

I will write again on the next rainy day.

Talk to you all later.

Do you think the grass is growing so wild and thick for its own life? Do you think the cutting is the ending, and not, also, a beginning?
Mary Oliver

What joy that each ending is also a new beginning.

Sunday Morning

Good morning all. I just puttered upstairs with my first cup of coffee of the day to check email and blogs before rushing headlong into the rest of my day. I hit Sage to see who had a new post and started checking each one. What a nice way to start the day.

Oh, it is so nice to be back home and in a bit of routine again. Life spins at an ever increasing rate of speed, as we prepare for our move, but I think I have my footing again. The Sold sign went up last night, so that "I" has been dotted nicely. Whew! I got two bookcases packed, and two loads of "stuff" delivered to the Goodwill on Friday, and AC and I even got out for a nice ride on the bikes, so life is good.

The sun is shining again today and the hot humid temps are visiting another part of the country, so we will hit the bike trails again this morning and tackle another bookcase or two this afternoon. First things first after all.

Well I must run, but will talk to you all later. Heather over at Fumbling for Words posted an excellent blog this morning. Go and have a look at it.

Oh it is so good to be back and visiting with you all again. I have missed chatting with you all each day and feel hugged and loved by all your kind welcome back comments. Thanks.

Enjoy the sunshine today, I know I will.

I send you my thoughts - the air between us is laden. My thoughts fly in at your window, a flock of wild birds."
Sara Teasdale

Tiara Day

Yes, I am wearing my Tiara today. Just seems appropriate somehow. I wear it when I feel joy and want to celebrate, or when my spirit is ruffled and upset and I need to find something to celebrate. Just to give you an idea of what is going on in my life these days, let me just say I am wearing the tiara for both reasons right now. Yep, both.

Have you been wondering where in the world I was and why it was taking me so long to post something? AC has been posting blogs, but still not a peep from me. What is going on? Well, let me fill you in on some of the details.

To say that I have been in a bit of a spin for the past week is an understatement! I have been in a dizzying freefall from one familiar trapeze to a brand new one and is has been one scary but exciting experience. What a rush! Now that my fingers are tightly clasped around the new trapeze and the screaming has stopped, I can take a few minutes to catch my breath, slow down a bit and maybe "pen" a few words.

The first three weeks of our vacation were great, but at the end of the third week AC had trouble with his back and we were forced to stay in Ottawa for another week in order for him to rest his back and get comfortable enough to travel. We took advantage of the extra time to browse the net and look at real estate in the area. To make a rather long story a bit shorter, let me just say that we found a small house we loved, located about two minutes from the water and marvellous bike paths. We put an offer in on it and it was accepted the next day. Yikes! At this point all the doubts about moving set in and got all tangled up with the joy. What a jumble of emotions I was experiencing. I would get up in the morning and wonder what in the world we had done. We now had to get home, talk to our real estate agent, finish the kitchen renovation job, and – oh yes - list our house and sell it!!!! We had five days to get all our ducks in a row and finalize the deal on the new house, or re-think the whole venture and call it all off. Oh dear. What to do?

We managed to get home on Saturday, unpacked, cleaned and polished the house and tended to a very messy garden all day Sunday, talked to our real estate agent on Monday, listed the house Tuesday morning, and by 9:30 Tuesday night we had a firm offer come in for it. Can you believe that? I am not sure I can. We didn't even have a chance to put a sign on the lawn, and it was sold. Things have certainly been moving at lightening speed and I am having trouble keeping up.

Wednesday was spent on myriad details of locating movers, firming up closing dates, arranging for new kitchen floor to be put in, and going through the motions of having MLS people view the house just in case the present offer hits a bump at the bank and the prospective buyers can't arrange a mortgage. They have until Wednesday to firm up their financing, so we now wait for that "I" to be dotted and "T" to be crossed. We had a new kitchen floor installed this morning, signed the remaining papers for our conditions on the sale this afternoon and now AC and I are trying to re-group and gather our strength to start the sorting and packing. Help!

So, dear friends, that is why I haven't written a word since we got home. I am not quite sure which end is up right now.

Letting go of my old familiar trapeze bar has sent waves of sheer panic shivering through me at times. The very thought of ripping up my roots here and moving to the other side of the province, after living in this area for over thirty years is frightening but exciting too. What a ride this is going to be.

I don't know how much writing I will be doing in the next little while, but I will check in when I can. I am sure AC will keep you up to date on our progress more than I will. He manages to stay up later than I do, and is able to work away on the computer while I am drifting in dreamland.

Well, I must run now, I am off to rustle up some boxes and pack a bookcase or two while I watch Wimbledon. (Oh the kazillion books that need to be packed!)

I hope you are having a tiara day too and enjoy each and every minute of this ride called life. Wheeeee!

Soar, eat ether, see what has never been seen, depart, be lost, but climb.
Edna St.Vincent Millay

Sisterhood

Tea with Henrietta Muir Edwards


What a joy to join this teaparty on Parliament Hill. I forgot my fancy dress but I brought my heartfelt thanks, and these women saved a chair for me and warmly invited me to join them.

"Come and sit down awhile with us Cuppa" I could hear them whispering to me as I passed by. I eagerly stepped back in time and entered this joyful celebration of their victory in the Persons Case of 1929, a landmark step in Canadian women's struggle for equality. I was honoured to be in their presence and felt right at home with them. These women won a legal challenge to have women considered "persons" under the British North America Act, making them eligible for appointment to the Senate. These five leading women were Emily Murphy, Henrietta Muir Edwards, Louise McKinney, Nellie McClung and Irene Parlby.

Thank you ladies. I will be eternally grateful.

"No woman should be shamefaced in attempting, through her work, to give back to the world a portion of its lost heart."
Louise Bogan

"Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal."
Pamela Starr

Continue to dream your dreams dear blogging sisters of mine and bring to your corner of the world a portion of its lost heart. We can be the change we want to see in this old world!

Coming and Going

This day greeted us with a warm and sunny embrace, so we set off mid-morning for a ride on our bikes. We clocked 82k's! Wow! That's pretty amazing for these old geezers huh? We are a tad knackered right now, but it is a nice knackered. The weatherman said the winds would be 5-10 km/h but I think he lied. They felt more like 20km/h there and back. Don't know how that happens, but we were pedalling into the wind BOTH ways. Sheesh! Oh well, we had a blast and that is all that matters.

Now it is time to clean up the bikes, do some last minute tidying up in the garden, pack up the suitcases, and head off on our holiday.

Those who contemplate the beauty of the earth find resources of strength that will endure as long as life lasts.
Rachel Carlson

There is a beauty in each phase of life isn't there? We should enjoy what is, while it is and embrace the next stage with all its beauty when it gets here. I hope you take time to contemplate the beauty all around you no matter what stage of life you are in right now- the fresh dewey yellow or the delicate fluffy white.

Garden Party

Spring unlocks the flowers to paint the laughing soil
Reginald Heber




Can't you almost hear the laughter in this picture? I was sure I heard chuckling when I was out working in the yard today! Such hilarity was going on between the Candytuft and the Forget-me-nots it was contagious and made me smile too, so I tried to capture the joy with my camera to share with you. Hope you feel it. My garden is having a party indeed. What fun!

The infinite has written his name on the heavens in shining stars
and on earth in tender flowers.
Jean Paul Richter

Come join the party, and keep your ears open for the laughter and your eyes open for the signature in the world all around you today.

Lilac Memories

We took our bikes out for a spin today and managed to clock 71k's. It was grand and glorious indeed. The sun was shining, the air warm,the winds gentle and we were given the gift of fragrant lilacs all along our country route.

Anvilcloud has posted some pictures of the route we took and other flowering trees we saw along the way. Go and have a peek here.

Drinking in the fragrance up close


Lilacs hold such sweet memories for me. My childhood home had a huge hedge of lilacs all along the border of the property and whenever I catch their scent now, I am taken right back to those wonderful May childhood days.

I cannot see or smell lilacs without thinking of my mother. She loved the flowers and told me many times how the church was full of fresh cut lilacs the day she was married - May 27th - and everybody at the wedding commented on the marvellous fragrance.

Memories are not glass treasures to be kept locked in a box.
They are bright ribbons to be hung in the wind.
Morgan Leah-Shamara

I took all of my bright ribbon memories out of their boxes as I pedalled along today and let them blow in the fragrant lilac wind. It was a totally awesome day!

Beauty in the eye of the beholder

Dandelions-by-lake


Things are busy around here getting ready for our holiday next week, but we took time out to soak in some sunshine today and take a 60k ride out to the lake. What a windy, wonderful ride!

We enjoyed our coffee here by the lake, and just had to take this picture for Heather. Your dad was right, they really are pretty.

How many ravishing things whose innocent beauty astounds us owe their existence to greed, fear or vainglory or guilt?
W.H.Auden

Blog Anniversary

I awoke around 6am this morning to the sound of rain tapping on my windowpane. The room was dark and cold, so I tucked the covers up under my chin and snuggle down deeper into the warm bed while the soft music of the rain sent me back into dreamland. I didn't hear another thing until 9:30. Yikes!!! Half the day was gone. Those 50k bike rides last week must have taken a bit more out of me than I realized. They sure were fun though. It looks like we have three days of sunshine coming up this week, so we are all set to hit the trails again tomorrow. I should really zip along after that huge sleep last night shouldn't I?

It is now almost noon and it is still raining, so I am enjoying a lazy morning responding to email, catching up on reading blogs, and even taking some time to indulge in the total luxury of putting a few thoughts down on paper. I love how a rainy day brings creativity to me just like it brings moisture to the gardens. It primes the pump and causes the thoughts and feeling to flow again. I do love a rainy day.

I started my blog last May, so this is my first anniversary, and I am taking a moment this morning to look back at where I have been and also wonder where to go with my blog from here. Do I still want to pour time and effort into writing a blog? The real question is: do I have anything else to say? I am not sure. For everything there is a season and this seems to be the season of my life for blogging, but at times I wonder.

There comes a time to step away from the laptop and just soak in life for a while. When the sun is shining and life calls me outside I have to listen and enjoy all the beauty of that season while it is here. The long cold days and nights of winter will soon be here again and lots of writing will happen then. For most of the summer, my blog might be neglected. I have tried taking the laptop out onto the back deck to write outside, but I can't see the screen out there. Drat! I might have to resort to the old pen and paper while the sun shines.

I sure have learned a lot from you all this past year and have made some wonderful friends out there in blogland. I would miss "talking" to you each day if I stopped blogging completely, so this is just a summer holiday break. I haven't met any of you face to face, but feel like I know you and have come "heart to heart" with many of you.

I have a picture in my mind of Mel, Wash Lady, Gina, Jen (X2), Iona, Karla, Heather, Katt, Norma, Swampy, Loner, Cat, Dale (X2), Lynn, and JV. They feel like family and I check in with them all each day and wonder how things are going in their lives.

I care about "Princess Mole Whacker" and laugh and cry with her at times. I printed out her Sharks, Loss and Snowflakes blog and have given it to many people in pain. Thanks Mel.

I have learned so much from Wash Lady and appreciate her wise words of advice to me and others. She has been through a lot and we all benefit from her life lessons.

Gina over at Just Another Day wears her glass slippers quite well, and I enjoy reading about her antics with Mr Personality each day.

Katt over at Bamboo Shade always has delightful and inspirational quotes and pictures for me. I copy and paste all the quotes into a Word file so I can later enter them into my quote data base. Yes, I am still working on that project.

Heather's new bike brought me joy too, and her sister's story about their dad's dandelion bouquets will visit me each time I see a field of dandelions now.

Cat's Place is a fun spot to visit and I love her memories and tales of England, open toed sandals and letters to Tide. I am wondering why the blog isn't called Moggy's Place though. I do love moggies. Do you Cat?

Loner's new found love is a cause for celebration and her dad's amazing spirit during his battle with cancer is inspirational.

Dale at M&M in M brings tears to my eyes and touches this mother's heart when he talks about his struggles with Dan and Meagan. When we become parents a part of our heart does walk around in the body of another person and it just plain hurts sometimes. Thanks for sharing so openly Dale. We all walk the path with you and feel for you.

Dale over at Tales from the Wayside makes me laugh right out loud. His antics on the small air plane had me in gales of laughter. And his "Laughing at Cats" is a real hoot.

Iona over at Circles and Squares helped me decorate my guest bedroom and has encouraged me while working on my kitchen project. Her photos are a work of art, and I wouldn't be at all surprised to see them in a book some day. I would buy one in a minute.

Swamp Things posts amazing photos each day too, and they are absolutely breathtaking. Oh the beauty of a snake, lizard, tick, spider, frog, toad, and last but not least, the Rainbow Scarab. What a cutie he is! Swampy's photos bring beauty and wonder into my life each day.

Jen over at Daydreams talks about dealing with physical pain, but the blogs that really touched my heart were The Result and Faith Story.


Lynn sitting at his computer on State Street has challeneged me to think and research different books and authors. He pointed me to "A book of Luminous Things", which I love, and has encouraged me to write. Thanks Lynn.

My heart was torn in two when Karla lost little Ava, and I continue walk beside her in spirit as she copes with grief and loss right now. I feel like I know her, and she is part of my family, a sister of the heart. Hang on sister dear.

How close we have all become in this blog circle of ours. I wonder how much we are like the people we have pictured in our mind's eye. If we met, would it be the same as meeting the radio announcer we have pictured perfectly from a voice, only to be surprised beyond words when we really see them? Here in blogland we don't have an audio voice to go by, but we have the written voice which is far more revealing, indelible, and clearer. We see each other in each and every word clicked and clacked on the keyboard. Here's looking at you kid.

This laptop monitor is only about ¼" thick, but it is a window on the world, and I see far and wide through it. I must raise my eyes from it and look at the world close to me every now and then, so I have something of this life to reflect back through this window to all of you peering in at me. Fun huh?

I so enjoy looking out through the many windows in my life every morning to see what is going on in my garden, and over in Holland, down in Florida, across the miles in Alberta, along other roads to Georgia, California, Illinois, Tennessee, Texas, North Carolina, and last but not least around the corner to assorted nooks and crannies in Ontario.

Goodness, I have rambled on quite a bit in this blog haven't I? So many people have touched my life in blogland during the past year and have become more than just passing acquaintances. On this one year anniversary I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your lives with me each day. I look forward to reading regularly this summer even if I don't write every day. Next week we are heading away for a month's holiday so my blogs will be few and far between for the next little while. I will check in with stories, updates and pictures when I can.

Talk to you all later. Happy Anniversary!

Puff, Pant, Gasp!!

Wow, lots of running with the old baton these days. I had a successful hand-off to Dale and he posted safely in spite of the scissors. Lynn also grasped the baton firmly and swiftly and made me laugh at the people he wanted to pass the baton on to. Gina made the connection and is still running. I will keep you posted on her progress.

Thanks one and all for joining in and having some fun.

I have now been tagged by Norma to accept another baton. I need a breather, but I will go check it out soon.

AC and I have been out on the bikes a lot this past week and have worked our distance up to 50k for each ride. It feels great, but with that and getting the kitchen back in order, I sure haven't had much time for anything else. Blogging time has been cut right down. When the sunshine and the great outdoors calls my name the laptop gathers dust.

I will be back when it rains. In the meantime have fun and enjoy the sunshine.

Talk to you all later.

The Baton

I have been tagged by Anvilcloud to take this baton and run with it. Tonight when we went out for our after dinner walk he was making fun of the way I used to run on the tennis court. So, maybe I will waltz with it awhile instead of trying to run with it!!

01. Total volume of music files on my computer?
Zero! Nope, not a single song. I use my laptop for writing and checking email and that is about it.

02. The last CD I bought was?
The last CD I bought was just a few days ago: Theresa Sokyrka's, These Old Charms. Hmmmmm, that sounds familiar doesn't it? Theresa has a delightful, slightly husky voice that is a pleasure to listen to. She was my number one choice for Canadian Idol last year even though she came in second.

03. Song playing right now.
Nothing right now. Theresa was playing in the family room this afternoon, while I unpacked boxes in the kitchen, and Sarah Brightman is in the CD player up here in my studio. If I have music on in the background while I am writing it is usually instrumental or something soft like Sarah Harmer or Enya. The CD's sitting on the top of that listening pile right now are – Vivaldi – The Four Seasons; Glenn Gould – At the Cinema; Lord of the Rings – The Return of the King and Lord of the Rings – The Fellowship of the Ring.

04. Five songs I listen to a lot or that mean a lot to me (in no particular order)

Pie Jesu – Sarah Brightman singing this song stops me in my tracks each time I hear it and brings tears to my eyes.

Into the West – Annie Lennox – If you have the extended version of Lord of the Rings you must watch the tribute to Duncan Cameron at the end of the last CD in the set. His story helped inspire this song.

Old Time Rock and Roll – Bob Seger – I can't say that I have listened to this song a lot lately, but it is one of my favorites. As soon as I hear the first few notes I just want to get up and move and sing along at the top of my lungs.

You Raise Me Up - Josh Groban – Butterfly chose this song for the father/daughter dance at her wedding last year, and it gives me goose bumps every time I listen to it now. Brings back all the memories of that wonderful day.

To Where you Are - Josh Groban – this song brings such comfort to a grieving heart. Our loved ones who have passed really are just a breath away.

05. Which 5 people are you passing this baton to, and why.

Gina, Heather, Lynn, Dale, and Iona ! These are just the names that popped into my head right now. Take it and have fun with it guys.

Honeymoons, other moons and decadence.

Weren't those old pictures we posted yesterday a hoot? What fun to look back at old photos of ourselves and see what young whippersnappers we were way back when, and relive all the wonderful memories of our wedding day. Thanks for all the warm wishes you posted on our blogs for us, they really added to the joy we shared on this anniversary.

Yesterday was a busy but relaxing day if that makes any sense at all. We left mid morning for our bike ride, and because it was a special day we allowed ourselves a stop at the chip truck down by the river for a plate of fries. We sat on a bench by the water and ate the hot, salty fries sprinkled with a light dash of vinegar. Oh, they were so good. We then pedalled another 15k out to the lake for a cup of coffee, and then home. It was a windy by sunny ride and we clocked 40k in all.

We meandered down memory lane as we pedalled along the bike paths and enjoyed a wonderful day of remembering all mixed in with the joy of being where we are in our lives right now. It was a great day. At one stop along the way I mentioned to AC how neat it was that we both chose a song to go with the pictures that we posted that morning. "Did you use a song too?" He said. "I didn't realize that. Can you sing it for me?" So there we were on a busy road, stopped at a traffic light and I was trying to sing the Shania Twain song to him. It was very funny.

We got home mid afternoon and our friends "St Paul and Minneapolis" dropped over with a bottle of cold bubbly and some warm wishes for us. We visited with them for awhile and then set off for our pizza dinner.

Now I know weddings are usually followed by Honeymoons, and ours was, 36 years ago, but I never expected a "moon" to be connected to this day again. It sure was yesterday though.

As we sat in the restaurant waiting for our pizza, four young girls came in and sat down across from us. Two were rail thin and two were a bit chunky. They all had on hip-hugger jeans which looked cute and tidy on the thin wispy girls, but the chunky girls were struggling to keep everything tucked in, if you get my drift.

They all sat down and two of them had their backs to us, right in my line of vision. I was shocked to look over and discover that the chunky girl's pants slipped right down her backside when she sat down and I was being mooned during the whole meal. It was very disconcerting. She didn't looked like a plumber, but her pants were sure plummeting! I mentioned this to AC and he glanced back and then turned to me and said. "I am just glad I am looking in the opposite direction and don't have to look at that for the whole meal."

I sat there wondering if I should mention something to her on our way out. If that were me, would I want to know? I think I would. It might be better coming from a total stranger, but it might really hurt her feelings too. AC didn't think I should say anything to her. I needed another woman's opinion and our waitress was a very friendly lady who looked to be in her late thirties so when she came to our table to see if we wanted anything else, I pointed out to her what I had been looking at during my whole meal and she was shocked. I asked her if she thought I should say something to the young girl. She thought it might be doing her a favour, but maybe ignorance is bliss too. I ended up not saying anything to her, but I still wonder if I should have. What would you have done?

We walked out of the restaurant and went across the road to a Dairy Queen for dessert. This was our anniversary after all and we were going to splurge on dessert too. I haven't been in a Dairy Queen for years, so I didn't really know what was on the menu anymore. We walked in and stood there looking at the different choices of rich gooey sundaes. The young kid behind the counter asked if he could help us, and I looked at him and said "We want something decadent." He had a blank look on his face and said "I don't know what that means." We explained to him that we wanted the richest, most gooey mess of a sundae he had on the menu and he still looked at us like we had just landed from Mars.

Maybe it was for the best that I didn't try to tell the young girl that her hip-hugger jeans weren't hugging nearly enough of her hips when she sat down. Sometimes the young and the old just don't speak the same language. It never hurts to err on the side of caution and always be kinder than we need to be. I just don't know if it was kinder to say something or not.

Anyway, we had a great day and now it is time to turn off the laptop and head out on the bike trails.

Hope you all have a great day.

Still the One

Thirty-six years and you're still the one AC. Love you!

House Hunting

As I sat in the family room this morning enjoying my first cup of coffee I noticed that the birds were busy checking out the real estate in our backyard. AC ran for his camera and caught these prospective buyers chatting on the front porch about the pros and cons of this house. I wonder what they were saying to each other. I think I heard one of them say "I like the garden. Do you like the kitchen?"

Check out AC's post for a picture of the pair checking out another house on the same street.

The antics of this feathered duo really brightened a rather dull rainy morning for me. I am so glad I took the time to sit quietly and look outside for a few minutes before I charged ahead into my day.

"Many eyes go through the meadow, but few see the flowers.
R. W. Emerson

Open your eyes wide as you walk through your meadow today and see all the "flowers" there.

Kitchen Update II

The sun is shining today, the grass needs cutting and the bike trails are calling out to us but first things first. I must update you on the kitchen progress, - right? This project is the monster that is eating most of my time and energy these days, but I think I am winning the battle with it. Still haven't found the sugar bowl though!

This week we got the range hood and sink light installed, the shelves put back in the cupboards, the plastic trim put on the edges of the shelves, the valance over the sink put up and all the quarter-round edging put up around the cupboards. Tonight the new doors go on and then I should be able to start putting stuff back in the upper cupboards. The bottom cupboards will stay empty until the counter-top is replaced – maybe next week – maybe not!!!!

I think the old brain has been addled by the paint fumes and plaster dust because I sure don't seem to have anything to write about these days. It seems almost impossible to put two words together to express a thought, so I won't attempt to bore you with drivel. Just update you for now, and write more later, when my brain clears and clicks into gear. Oh please let it click back into gear soon.

The best was to secure future happiness is to be as happy as is rightfully possible today.
Charles Eliot

I hope you find something to smile about today and are as happy as is rightfully possible. Have a good day.

Queen for a Day!

I had so much fun today, and an extra sparkle was added to everything I did. Yes I positively glittered and shone all day, courtesy of Butterfly.

We have a running joke involving a tiara that started many years ago while watching the Oscars with Butterfly. To make a rather long story a bit shorter let me just say that we sat in Butterfly's little basement apartment with paper tiaras on our heads while we watched the show on TV. Even AC had a tiara!!!! What a hoot that was.

Butterfly got married last year and she picked a beautiful tiara for her headpiece. This tiara now comes out for every birthday dinner or other special occasion and is worn by the person of honour. I got to wear it at our Christmas dinner this year and I loved it. What fun.

Imagine my surprise and delight this morning when I opened my Mother's Day gift from Butterfly and found my very own tiara tucked inside a box for me. It was just too funny.

I put it on while I ate breakfast and I must admit it made me feel very regal and special. Amazing what a tiara can do for one's attitude!!! Every woman should have one. Really!

I wanted to wear it on my bike ride, but figured the helmet was safer, so I left it at home during our ride, but as soon as we got home and the helmet came off, the tiara went back on and I wore it while I washed the car!!!! What total fun I had with it all day.

Thanks Butterfly. I had a blast and felt like a Queen all day.

Good Day!

I thought this was going to be a busy weekend of work on the kitchen, but Mother's Day festivities and activities came first for the family man who is installing the cupboard doors, so all renovation tasks were put on hold for a couple of days.

The sun was shining this morning, and with the kitchen work on hold, and the yard work done, AC and I decided to take advantage of the weekend work break, and set off on our bikes. We packed a lunch, and a map of a new area to bike to, and headed out for an exciting adventure. We set a goal of 50k for our trip today and didn't know where the 25k turn around point would be. I adjusted the GPS to clock our time and distance and off we went.

We found a wonderful secluded picnic spot at kilometre 23 and stopped there for lunch. The road leading to it was called Windcliff, and amazingly enough, it lead to a rather windy cliff overlooking the lake. No problem though, the sun was shining warmly and we kept our coats zipped up tight so we were as warm as toast while we munched our main course of Swiss cheese and lettuce sandwiches, followed by crisp juicy red grapes for dessert. Yum!

AC at Windcliff


We thought we had found a gem of a picnic spot that nobody else knew about, but as we sat there eating our lunch, two or three car loads of people drove up the road and stopped to take in the view of the lake. None of them stayed long, and we were the only brave cyclists, but when I went to put my garbage in the trash can put there by the township, I noticed it was full of empty Tim Horton's coffee cups. What a hoot! Anyway, we were the only picnickers there today, so we enjoyed exclusive use of the picnic table.

After lunch we continued on down the road for another 2k's in order to hit the 25k mark, and then turned around. We were sure ready for a cup of coffee by the time we reached Tim's at kilometre 35 on our way home! Mmmmm that coffee tasted extra special delicious today. After our break at Tim's our legs were in a bit of an uproar when we first got back on the bikes, but after a few minutes they warmed up again and we were zipping along in no time. The wind seemed to pick up strength and gave us a mighty battle at some points along the trail home, but for the last few klicks we lucked out and actually had the wind at our backs, so it was coast and enjoy during that homeward stretch. Yahoo!

What a great day this has been. Not only did we have a break from the decorating, but enjoyed a sunny bike ride, time to write a little and now time to read. Yep, a great day.

Whatever busyness filled your days this week, I hope you had a chance to relax today and get out into the great outdoors to soak up some of the marvellous spring sunshine.

It is good to have an end to journey towards; but it is the journey that matters, in the end.
~Ursula K. LeGuin

Don't forget to enjoy yours!

Renovation update

Slowly but surely we are moving ahead with the kitchen. We are not breaking any speed records, that's for sure, but we are moving forward.

Painting done


As you can see here, the walls and trim are all painted, so that is one major task behind us. Hopefully this weekend we will get the new cupboard doors installed, sink light and range hood hooked up and all the new plugs and switches put in. Then we will move on to the big job for next week – installation of the new counter-top. Fun! Fun! Fun!

Writing time is pretty scarce these days, but AC and I did manage to squeeze in a bike ride or two this week and it felt so good to pedal some of the decorating stress away. We got out for a 40k ride on Wednesday and a 30k ride yesterday, and that made us pretty happy.

Yard work had to be done today, so the bikes and paint brushes gathered dust while we pruned roses, weeded gardens, washed the car, got all the summer furniture out, washed it down and set it up on the back deck. Whew! Busy way to end an even busier week. We both feel a bit knackered tonight, but it is a well deserved knackered!!!

I hope you all have a chance to walk in the sunshine this weekend and enjoy the fresh touch of spring in the air. I know I will. Talk to you all next week.

Oh yes, and to all you mothers out there, Happy Mother's Day.

The Stick

I received this challenge from Gina a few weeks ago and accepted The Stick eagerly. Once my running shoes were tightened and my muscles stretched I took the stick and had fun running with it. I had to put it down for awhile when the redecorating started in my kitchen, and I must admit that I misplaced. Sorry. I found it in a rather dusty writing folder today so I now pass it on to you. If you want to take it and run with it, give these questions some thought and then answer them on your blog sometime in the near future. Ready! Set! Go!!!!!

You're stuck inside Fahrenheit 451, which book do you want to be?
What book do I want to be? What an interesting question. Not, which book do I want to burn, or save from burning, but which book do I want to be? Hmmm? I would want to be a poetry book. As Mary Oliver says, “…for poems are not words, after all, but fires for the cold, ropes let down to the lost, something as necessary as bread in the pockets of the hungry.”

Seems like the world in the middle of Fahrenheit 451 is a pretty lost and scary place to be, so poetry would be needed more than anything.

“Poetry is not the assertion of truth, but the making of that truth more fully real to us.” T.S. Eliot

Yes, I would want to be a poetry book and make truth more fully real.


Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

I absolutely adored Robin Hood when I was a kid. I loved the idea of living in a secret place in the forest and making my house in a tree. My friend Sheila and I would play make-believe out in the back yard and we would dress up in long dresses and be Maid Marion and her Lady-in-waiting, helping Robin when he asked us to. What fun!

Now that I am a “few” years older I still like the idea of living in a tree in a secret place in the forest. I don’t want to be Maid Marion anymore though. I sure don’t want to be left waiting back at the castle to help Robin if need be. I want to be one of the Merry WoMen and live in the forest and ride out and help rob the rich to feed the poor.


Longest lasting crush?

I would have to say AC. After 36 years of marriage I still think he is the greatest and love him to pieces.


The last book you bought is:

I could spend the grocery money at the bookstore! I really could. Many years ago I worked at a little independent bookstore and on some paydays I would owe them money instead of the other way around. I wanted to buy almost every new book that came in. I love the smell of books, the feel of books, the sight of books, and oh the treasure that some of them hold within. So many books to read, so little time!

I now make myself use the Public Library and put new books on order there. I sometimes only get through one chapter and know that I must add this one to my personal collection, but others I am glad to return, happy in the knowledge that I didn’t waste my money on them. So any book that I actually buy now has to be a keeper and one that I will go back to again and again.

Now that I have set the stage, let me tell you the latest one to win the prize and get my money. The Mermaid Chair by Sue Monk Kidd, (fiction). I very rarely buy fiction, but I so enjoyed The Secret Life of Bees also by Kidd, that I knew I would want to add her latest book to my select collection of fiction.

The book I bought just before The Mermaid Chair was The Dance of the Dissident Daughter also by Sue Monk Kidd (non-fiction). What a gem. I read my sister’s copy first and was itching to mark it up and knew I had to have my own copy. This book recounts Kidd’s journey from Christian tradition to the sacred feminine, and it has been the most thought provoking book for me let me tell you. I am now on my second sweep through it, and lots of underlining is going on. Yes, I mark the books I read. Do you?


The last book you finished:

Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver. Great book. Kingsolver not only tells a good story, but she teaches you something about the world around you at the same time. This book gave me a whole new appreciation for predators, and convinced me of their important part in the great scheme of things. The world is amazingly complex and each little part of it is important and needed to keep the delicate balance in nature.


What are you currently reading?

I always have more that one book on the go at a time, and which one I pick up depends on time of day or how I am feeling.

One or two poetry books are always close at hand. Right now, Raymond Carver’s All of Us is on the coffee table by my chair in the family room, and Milosz’s, A book of Luminous Things, is on the little table beside me here in my studio.

I usually have a book of fiction on the go too, and right now it is
Pigs in Heaven by Barbara Kingsolver - I just started this one, so don’t know if I will like it or not.

I also am working my way through Dance of the Dissident Daughter for a second time.

I just got Beauty The invisible Embrace by John O’Donohue from the library, and can’t wait to start it.

When my eyes are too tired to read, I listen to books on tape when I go to bed. I keep my local library very busy


Five books you would take to a deserted island:

I would definitely want books that I could read over and over again and poetry sure fits that bill. So, I would tuck a couple of anthologies into a water proof container and make sure they got to the island with me.

A book of Luminous Things: An international anthology of poetry by Czeslaw Milosz. Ah, such a treat to read over and over again.

The Best Poems of the English Language, from Chaucer through Frost by Harold Bloom. I just got this for my birthday and it could keep me going for a long time I am sure.

Remembrance of Things Past by Marcel Proust. I have read so many snippets of Proust by have never found the time to get all the way through this entire work. I think a visit to a deserted island would give me the perfect opportunity to do this.

A Wilderness survival book. I might really need that kind of a book if I am on a deserted island, and nothing sparks the interest in a book like need!

Dictionary – Yes, for sure a dictionary would be on the list. It would have to be the biggest, most comprehensive one around too. Full of all the old, old, old words along with the most current additions to the language. Wow just think of the improvement I could make to my vocabulary and what a benefit that would be if I ever got off the island and back to civilization again. Yes, a dictionary could keep me going for the rest of my natural life and I would never get bored.

So, there you have it. I am not sure what it is that you have, but The Stick was fun to play with for a while. I tossed it in the air, dragged it along on a walk or two and took it with me out on the bike for a windy ride. Now I am ready to pass it along to you. Take it and have some fun.

A little past the middle!

Yes, I am a little past the middle of the muddle in our kitchen renovation job, but only a little. We still have a long way to go, but, with the help of my sweet niece Sarah and our kind neighbour Brian, we are moving right along.

The wall paper was THE WORST stuff to get off, but Sarah won the battle yesterday and got the last bits of glue to let go. Yahoo!




Sarah is painting today, and even though that is hard work, it is going much smoother and faster than the scraping the wall paper phase went.

I sure don't have much time to relax and write these days, but will be back soon.

Talk to you all later.

Daffodils

Wow! What a difference a day makes!!!!

On Sunday I thought the daffodils were down for the count for sure and we wouldn't see them again until next year. Yesterday we had a brief visit from the sun and although the visit was short and cool, it made the air warm enough to melt the snow and revive the old yellow heads just a tad.

I got up this morning and was shocked to see the whole bank of flowers completely revived and soaking up a gentle spring rain. Isn't nature grand?

The storms pass, they always do.

Sunday April 24th


Tuesday April 26

Tears

There must be something strangely sacred in salt. It is in our tears and in the ocean.
Kahlil Gibran

At times in our lives we feel like we are shedding our own ocean of tears don’t we? The hurt is that endless and fathomless, and we just can’t see to the other side of it. Adrift in the sorrow we think it will never end, and we will never feel solid ground under our feet again. Even though we can’t see it while we are in the middle of the ocean of tears, there is a shoreline waiting for us on the other side of the grief and we will get to it one day.

While we are adrift in the middle of the sorrow, we must allow ourselves to just be, to float where the wind and currents take us each day and let those tears flow freely. There is salt in our tears and a healing property in salt. Maybe, just maybe the salt in our tears will help to heal the open wound in our heart.

There will be a time to stop floating and to start swimming towards that distant unseen shoreline, but the heart has to rest and heal a bit first. So, when the grief is fresh and raw, let the tears flow freely and apply the salt liberally to the wound.

Crushed

It is snowing here in our corner of the world and somehow it goes with the feelings swirling around me like snowflakes today. Things seem all out of whack with life, and I am ruffled in my sprit, so it seems only normal for nature to reflect those feelings.

Here it is the 23rd of April, and we are having a winter storm. Unbelievable! Our lovely daffodils are in full glorious bloom, but they are crushed right down to earth under a layer of heavy wet snow. The winds are gusting up to 70 km/h, and the snow is blowing around in a fury.

Yes the weather reflects my feelings perfectly today and my heart aches for Karla and Mark. I think of them when I look at my garden weighed down under the snow and wonder if they feel beaten down too. This was supposed to be a warm sunny time in their lives, but instead they are in the middle of the worst storm imaginable and are under the cold weight of sorrow. Take heart dear ones. Your family and friends see you there in that cold dark place and weep for you and care. You are not alone.

You might feel crushed by the storms of life right now, but you will feel the sunshine again. It is behind the clouds for a time, but it will shine again some day. Take heart.

With Love

Ava’s Gift

Nine months in utero, seven hours in Mommy and Daddy’s arms, eternity in God’s embrace, and a lifetime in our hearts and memory.

Sweet little Ava, your time on this earth was much too short, but your gift to us is special and to be celebrated.

The sight of the imprint of your tiny hands and feet moved me to tears and touched me deeply. Your little feet might never run and play on this earth, but they tiptoed across my heart and left an impression there. Your little hands touched my spirit and I thank you for that gift. Your life has spread feelings of love and compassion around the world and the world is a better place because you were in it, if even for such a short time.

Thank you Karla and Mark for sharing your joy and sorrow so openly with all of us. Your little Angel’s life is a gift we will treasure and remember.

The Heavens are crying too.

I awoke to the sounds of rain this morning and it reflected my feelings perfectly. My first thought was “Oh the heavens are crying too!” I am so sad and feel such sorrow for Karla and Mark that my heart is breaking for them. God help them and comfort them today.

I feel so helpless and don’t really know what to do or say because I haven’t walked in their shoes. I don’t know what it is like to lose a child after carrying her for nine months and only holding her for seven short hours.

As I sit here thinking about Karla this morning I am reminded of this story I heard years ago.

A young mother was busy doing her housework when she noticed her little daughter and her friend sitting out on the patio crying. She went to the door and asked them what was wrong. Her daughter turned to her with tears streaming down her face and said, “Mary’s dolly is broken and that makes her sad. I can’t fix her dolly or make it better, so I am just sitting here helping her cry.”

Oh Karla, I can’t fix it, make it better, or take your pain away, but I can sit here beside you and help you cry.

Love, hugs and tears! Cuppa

Middle of a Muddle

Here we go again. As you could probably tell from this blog (Guest Room), I am not an interior decorator. No, it is NOT my favourite thing to do by a long shot. I like the finished product but not the planning or the doing. Some people thrive on the thrill of picking paint colours and flooring and counter tops and putting them all together to change a room completely. But not me. My sister, my daughter, my sister-in-law — just to name a few, seem to love it and have a knack for it, but they all live too far away to help me right now. Drat! I don’t have the smattering of a knack for it, and I plain don’t like it.

Having said all that let me tell you that right now we are preparing to redecorate the kitchen as it is sorely in need of it!! Yes, the kitchen of all places. The hub of the house, my first stop for coffee every morning, the place where all the meals are prepared and eaten, the place where phone calls are made and the appointment calendar kept, and above all, the place where I make my afternoon cup of tea! Yes, the hub of the house. Oh dear! I am in the middle of a muddle supreme!

AC and I know that we can’t do the actual painting because of our backs, but we have to get the kitchen ready for the workmen, so this past week we have been be sorting and packing and cleaning the kitchen cupboards. Yuck! It is almost done now, thank goodness. Multiple boxes are stored in the basement; other “stuff” is spread out on tables in the living room and dining room and 5 boxes went out to the Goodwill. Today, we moved the last two items to the dining room — the microwave and the coffee pot, and now the hub is all set up in the new location for the duration of the redecorating. Whew!

The kitchen will get new cupboard doors, coats of paint inside and out, wallpaper stripped off walls, new flooring put down, new counter top installed, three new light fixtures added to brighten the place up and a new range hood to finish things off. We are not doing the work, but we have to live in the upheaval for the next little while, and I am not looking forward to that at all, but I am trying to focus on the positive. The light at the end of the tunnel — a bright, spanking new kitchen, does look and sound good to me. The end product will be really nice. My daughter keeps telling me to enjoy it. It is fun she tells me. I can’t quite see it like that, but I am trying Butterfly. I am trying!

You might be reading this and wondering what all the fuss is about. Why would I be so stressed out about a little redecorating? What is the big deal already? I am not sure why it is so stressful for me, but I think it stems back to what my house was like as a kid.

We lived in a tiny house that was bursting at the seams with four kids, mom and dad and my grandparents all living under one roof. Things had to change but rather than move into a bigger house, mom and dad decided to renovate and add on to the old house.

My dad was up to the challenge and set to the building project with gusto. He knocked down walls, put up framing, nailed dry wall into place, added windows and doors, put in new floors, along with myriad other things, but he never seemed to finish anything. For a large part of my childhood I lived with plaster dust all over everything; plywood floors waiting for linoleum, or carpet; drywall waiting for paint, baseboards and quarter-round; windows and doorways draped with tarps waiting for the finishing touches — like glass and doors; and, the endless mess and muddle of building supplies everywhere. My dad’s intentions were good, but he worked a full time job and did all the renovations and redecorating during the evenings or on weekends, and I think he just ran out of time and energy. My mom wasn’t the greatest housekeeper to begin with and the insidious plaster dust and mess broke her spirit, I am sure.

Yes, we lived in a disorganized, plaster-dust-coated-muddle and I didn’t like it at all. I longed for a tidy house with some order in it. I would go to my friends' houses when I was a kid and marvel at the finished walls, shiny floors and tidy rooms. I wanted that too. To this day even the thought of a redecorating upheaval gives me the shivers. I want to run away to a neat and tidy corner of the universe until it is all over.

I am not sure if I will be able to hide away in my little upstairs nook and write a lot while the transformation takes place in the kitchen, or not. We shall see. If I don’t post many blogs in the near future at least you will know the reason why. On the other hand I might find that it is my salvation and sanity to tuck myself into my little corner up here and write the next few weeks into history! I have stacks of books at the ready beside me to run away into if the need arises. Don’t you just love the way books can transport you to a whole new time and place when the one you are living in becomes too stressful? I did that many times as a kid.

In spite of all the cleaning, sorting and packing that went on last week, AC and I managed to bike out to the lake three times, and it was a great stress reliever. I have a feeling that if the weather permits, we will be out on the bikes a lot during this redecorating event. Pedal, write or read that stress away, will be my motto for the next few weeks.

Well, I must toddle down to the new hub and rustle up some lunch now. I hope you all have a great weekend and are able to pedal, read or write your stresses away too. Whatever muddle you are in the middle of, focus on the positive, focus on the positive, focus on the positive.

Take care. Talk to you all later.

Molly, Jessie, and Pearl

Molly, Jessie, and Pearl were the best of friends. They grew up together, shared their hopes and dreams as teenagers; attended each other’s weddings; held on to each other when their young husbands marched off to war, rejoiced together when the men all returned safely, gave each other support as young mothers, encouragement as the mothers of teens, and shared in the joys of weddings and grandchildren as they aged together. They never lost contact and were always there for each other. What a rich treasure friendship is.

I am the daughter of Pearl who died on Christmas day, twelve years ago. The busyness of life and geographical distance caused me to lose contact with Aunt Jessie and Aunt Molly after mom’s death. Well, that gap was closed this past weekend, and we all got together for a walk down memory lane. Molly, Jessie, my sister Heather, Jessie’s daughter Sheila (my best friend when I was growing up) and I all gathered at Molly’s house for lunch! What a wonderful time we had. We talked and laughed the afternoon away and lots of hugs were shared all around.

Molly and Jessie are in their mid to late eighties now, and they look marvellous. They are both in good health and are mentally and physically in top form. Neither of them looked a speck older to me. They keep active with their circle of friends and are members of the Red Hat Society. Molly talked about the latest play she had attended, and Jessie doesn’t let any grass grow under her feet either. She had to leave early to attend another party that day. Busy, busy, busy, and active ladies they both are. What a joy to not only walk down memory lane with them, but to talk about current events, learn about the latest books they are reading or who their favourite authors are. These gals are so with it and alive and living every moment of their lives. What a joy to see. I want to be just like them when I grow up!

Sheila and I caught up on family news and exchanged email addresses, so I am sure that notes and letters will be flying fast and furious between us now. The internet makes everyone seem so much closer, and it is so much easier to stay in touch. We promised to write and set dates to get together again soon. Our moms kept contact through the years, and we are determined to renew ties and keep our friendship alive too.

Molly made us a delicious lunch and Jessie helped her serve it. They said that the "girls" - meaning us, the almost 60-year-old-kids - needed to visit and chat. So we sat and talked while "the moms" made and served us lunch. It was such fun. The table was all set with fine china and silverware, and we gathered round it to enjoy a most elegant tea party. Before we sat down at the table Molly brought out her string of pearls and said that mom needed to join us too (my mom's name was Pearl), so she draped a string of pearls over a vase of yellow tulips in the centre of the table (see yellow circle in photo), and she put a book that had belonged to my mom on the sideboard by the dining table. It brought tears to my eyes.

Visiting with these special friends of mom was just like visiting with her. We all felt as if mom was right there with us, and I am sure she was peeking over the clouds at us and had a cup of heavenly tea while we sipped tea from china teacups and talked about old times and enjoyed memories full of her. She felt so close to me that day, and it was very special.

Thank you Molly and Jessie for continuing to mother me and be there for me when my own mom can’t be. You both touched my heart as only a mother can. Heart hugs to both of you. Love Cuppa

Thank you Terry

AC and I arrived home from our trip late last night, so we slept in this morning and then puttered away working on this and that until lunch time. After a light lunch, we set off on our bikes for a ride out to the lake. It was a bright sunny day, but too cold and windy to picnic by the water, so we settled for a ride along the trail and a hot coffee at Tim’s at the half-way point.

Usually when we pedal into the wind we will make comments back and forth to each other about how tough the ride is and how strong the wind is. This afternoon we were both unusually quite. I pedalled along in my own little world and AC was in his.

After about 15 minutes of tough slogging into the cold north wind we stopped at a street crossing to catch our breath and wait for a few cars to pass. AC turned to me and said “It might be cold and windy today, but if Terry Fox could run 42k in cold wet weather on this day 25 years ago, I can pedal into the wind and not complain today. “ (Read AC's thoughts about Terry here.)

I had forgotten that this was the 25th anniversary of the first day of Terry’s run, and AC’s comment sent my mind back to that very special time in our lives when this young runner captured all of our hearts. We soared with him and hoped with him as he ran, and our hearts broke for him when he had to abandon his run in Thunder Bay because the cancer had once again attacked his body.

The traffic soon cleared, and AC and I set off on our ride again. My thoughts during the next portion of our ride were filled with memories of Terry.

My mind went back to a car trip we took a few year ago along the Trans-Canada highway north of Superior. I remembered how moved I was when we drove through that rugged terrain and saw pictures of Terry all along the section of the highway they had renamed “The Terry Fox Highway of Courage”. As we drove up and down those hills I looked out the car window and tears streamed down my face as I realized that the young one-legged runner had jog-hopped every inch of this path. I was tired just driving that long distance and he had jog-hopped every inch of it. Amazing! Truly amazing and inspiring!

We drove into Thunder Bay and stood at the monument placed there to honour him, and we wept for the loss of his life and the sorrow cancer brings into so many lives. He truly touched all of our hearts in a deep and profound way.

Thank you Terry. We won’t forget you and we will continue to hope that cancer can be beaten.

First picnic at the lake

Time to celebrate! We got out on the bike trails today and had our first picnic at the lake. Yahoo! We packed a lunch, then stopped along the way at our favourite Tim’s for coffee with double cream. Yum! We packed the drinks carefully in the carrier bag and took the feast to the water’s edge. Mmmmm, cheese and lettuce on a fresh whole-wheat roll, followed by a crisp sweet apple for dessert, never tasted so good! It was grand and glorious indeed.

We pedalled about 32k in all and soaked up lots of sunshine and fresh air along the way. The sun was shining and the air warm when we set off, but as we got closer to the lake and had to pedal into the wind the old hands and face got a bit cold. Brrrr. There is still a lot of ice on the lake so the wind coming off the water had a real bite to it. We did find a calm sunny spot for our picnic though, so we were as warm as toast as we munched our sandwiches and sipped our hot coffee.

By the time we set off for home the clouds started to roll in and the wind picked up strength considerably, so the last few klicks were tough slogging let me tell you. We were rather pooped by the time we pulled into our driveway, but it was that nice kind of tired that comes at the end of a long enjoyable ride. You know, that delicious mixture of being tired and exhilarated both at the same time.

The weatherman is calling for rain tomorrow so we won’t be riding again until next week now. We are off to Toronto to visit family this weekend, so my blog will be quiet for the next few days. I will talk to you all next week.

Hope you have a wonderful weekend and enjoy a smooth ride no matter what trail you have to navigate or what weather you encounter along the way. Have fun with life this weekend and enjoy the ride.

Soft Day

The roar is way off in the distance today and the soft gentle sounds of spring are filling the air in my corner of the world this morning. How wonderful to hear them again. The sunshine came streaming in the window early, early, early, and brought along with it the sounds of Robins frolicking in the back yard searching for their breakfast. I got up and went in search of my breakfast too. I made coffee and took my steaming mug full of the fragrant brew over to an open window and drank in the sounds of the morning along with the delicious coffee. Mmmmmmm good!

We got out on our bikes yesterday and enjoyed a windy by wonderful 24k ride. As we road along the sunny trail it was hard to believe that we drove through such a blizzard just two days before. Oh well, such is spring in our little corner of the world.

The garden is starting to come to life and even show some colour. AC posted a great picture of the first crocus in the back yard on his blog here. The tulips and daffodils are coming up and will soon be in bloom too. It amazes me each year that so much life and beauty can come up through all that dark cold ground after such a long dark winter.

If you don’t have a spring garden about to burst into life where you are, go out and buy yourself a little pot of spring bulbs and put them in a sunny spot of your home to bring the beauty and the wonder of the garden to you.

If you have two loaves of bread, sell one and buy a hyacinth to feed your soul.
Anonymous

Well, I must run now, company is coming for dinner tonight, so I am off to purchase fresh bread and salad fixin’s while AC whips up a feast in the kitchen. Oh yes, I will buy a hyacinth too.

If you can, get out for a walk today, or take time to sit by an open window and enjoy this soft day full of the wonders of spring.

Talk to you tomorrow. Take care.

Butterflies and Lady Bugs

I am not sure if I can still be called Cuppa or not, but I think so!!! Kids really make life interesting and fun don’t they?

Anvilcloud (AC) started a blog last May, and then got me hooked on blogging too. What fun. We soon convinced Daughter #1 to give it a whirl and she loved it in no time. Daughter #2 is in her third year at University and is up to her ears in schoolwork, so she hasn’t ventured into the blog world yet, but I think she might one day.

Daughter #1 set up her blog and called herself Butterfly, so her blog name is just that. Daughter #2 came home this Easter weekend and said she wanted a name other than Daughter #2 in our blogs, so we told her to choose one she liked and we would use it in our future blogs.

Well, we just got word this week that she wants to be called Lady Bug!!! I thought I should pass this little bit of information on to you, so in future when I talk about Lady Bug and Butterfly in my blogs you will know who in the world I am talking about.

As I said at the beginning of this post, I am not sure if I can still call myself Cuppa if my daughters want to call themselves Butterfly and Lady Bug but I think I can. Over the years their antics have sent me in search of a good hot cup of tea to calm my nerves, lift my spirits, or warm my heart chilled with fear. Now when they come home as adults for a visit, they share a good hot cuppa with me and we talk about hopes and dreams and we celebrate their achievements over a steaming mug of that good old Brown Betty Brew.

I might have bugged them a lot as they were growing up, and they sure drove me buggy at times, but they have now each taken wing and become beautiful women adding richness and colour to this old world. They are so different, yet so much alike and are both warm, vibrant, caring human beings.

Love you bunches Butterfly and Lady Bug. Flit on by for a cup of tea soon.

Love and hugs Mom.

Take me out to the ball game

On a wintry day in March I was reading Lynn’s blog and in it he mentioned that he longed for a sunny day at the ballpark. I sat by my snowy window that day and let my mind wander to that sunny place too and I could almost hear the crack of the bat and the muttering of the crowd. Mmmmm, that really warmed up a cold wintry day. We had another blast of winter yesterday, but the baseball season opened today, so sunny summer days can't be far away now. Yahoo!

We used to enjoy going to the old Tiger stadium in Detroit to watch major league games. It was a bit harrowing to drive in downtown Detroit, when we were accustomed to navigating quieter roads in our small Ontario town, but it was well worth every minute of the nervous drive, to sit in that fabulous old ballpark and watch the Tigers play.

Sunny afternoons at the park were great, but I think the night games in the summer were my favourite though. All the sounds seemed to be more intense at night and the field was dazzling under the lights. I would look up at the dark night sky all around me and seem to be in a magical bubble in the middle of the big city of Detroit. Oh yes, take me out to the ball game!!!

Most of the games I enjoyed were spent in little ballparks not major league ones though. Daughter #2 played ball and she was a member of a travel team, so we enjoyed many years of cheering her on in ballparks all over Ontario and a few in Michigan.

The travel tournaments were played in big fancy ballparks, but the home games were a different story. We have lots of farms around us here where we live, and when Daughter #2’s travel team played at home they played teams from all over the county.
We would spend two or three nights each week going to these little communities and playing on diamonds literally in the middle of a cornfield. I absolutely loved it.

As we drove down the country roads, we could see the lights for the field we would be playing on long before we could actually see the field. We would then turn a corner and there would be this ball diamond in the middle of nowhere. The lights would be on, the stands starting to fill up with people and the air alive with a certain kind of magic. It was like something out of "Field of Dreams", and I would sit there and expect ghost players to start coming out of the corn and want to join our game. The field would be all lit up, but if we turned around in our bleacher seats, the area around us would just be dark fields of corn. It was totally awesome.

I remember one time Daughter #2 was pitching in a big city tournament north of Toronto, while my dad was dying in a hospital in downtown Toronto. I had to miss the tournament to be with my dad but Daughter #2 and AC went to the tournament to face many big city teams with lots more talent than our little travel team had. Daughter #2 pitched her heart out for grandpa that weekend and her team won the gold medal and she took the tournament MVP award. She came to the hospital on Sunday night to see grandpa and tell him about her games. He was in a coma, but we talked to him and felt sure that he could hear us. She held her medal and trophy up for him and told him all about her games as tears filled her eyes, and ours too. Dad didn't move or respond in any way while she talked to him, but two or three minutes after she finished and we stood around his bedside talking, dad opened his eyes and said to me, "You must be so proud of her." We all stood in amazement and said yes we were and he then closed his eyes and slipped back into his coma.

Just a few days after that he died and two weeks after his funeral I found myself sitting in the bleachers at a ball diamond in the middle of a cornfield back home watching Daughter #2 play. I sat on the top row of the bleachers and felt my dad stepping across the universe to me, to sit right there beside me to comfort me and cheer his granddaughter on. I cried through the whole game and felt healing come with each tear I shed.

Ah such sweet memories and the magic of a baseball diamond on a summer's evening. A touch of heaven indeed! Lynn’s comment on his blog brought all those warm memories back to me on that cold wintry day in March and again today as I write this. I miss my dad a lot, but feel him reaching across the universe to me once more as I relive that special last weekend with him and Daughter #2.

Angels do visit us wearing all sorts of different coats don't they? Sometimes they wear yellow cloth coats we can see with our eyes, but other times they wear the mystical coat of a memory we can only see with our heart.

Batter up! Play Ball!

Lion still on the prowl…

We were out on our bikes on Friday and had a nice ride even if it was a bit cool and a tad windier than we expected.

Yesterday we went to the big city to meet a friend for lunch and then visit another friend for the afternoon. This excursion involved a five hour round trip so we set off early in the morning and planned to be away for the whole day. When we left early in the morning it was pouring rain, but by the time we got to the restaurant we were faced with gale force winds (55 – 60 kph) and snow!!! Yes snow! How cruel on April 2nd.

We spent a couple of hours visiting at the restaurant and then continued on our way to see our other friend for the rest of the afternoon. The rain/snow had stopped at this point, but the winds were fierce. The lion was swatting his paw furiously at my hairdo again and the lamb was in hiding.

As we drove along we notice the fields covered in snow and marvelled at the havoc the lion had caused on this spring day. Little did we know that the worst was yet to come!

We enjoyed a nice visit with our friend for the afternoon and then set off around suppertime for the 2 1/2 hour drive home. What an adventure that was. The lion had done nothing but build up strength all day and was really throwing a temper tantrum by that time. The winds were blowing across the highway at what seemed like hurricane force and the snow came at us thick and blinding. Our little CRV was rocked back and forth and it was a struggle to keep it on the straight and narrow, when we could see the straight and narrow that is. It was awful! The temperature was hovering around freezing, so we didn’t know if we would hit black ice or not, so even though we had traction at his minute we didn’t know if we would have for the next!!! What a ride! We could hardly believe that just the day before we had been out on our bikes enjoying a nice spring jaunt.

When we were about ten minutes from home the snow eased up, the road dried up and we could see some clearing in the sky ahead, but the wind continued to rant and rave and do its best to throw us into the ditch.

Exhausted and hungry, we pulled into town around 7pm and went straight to a restaurant for dinner. We fought with the wind as we walked across the parking lot and soon were seated at a table in the cozy eatery. We sat down and stared at each other in quiet, wild-eyed wonder for a few minutes. Were we really here safe and sound? Was the trip really behind us? Was this really April 2nd? Oh I was so glad to be off that highway and only 5 minutes from home.

The dinner tasted absolutely wonderful but I think it was because it was mixed with the rich flavourful feelings of relief and gratitude that we had made it home safely. Positively delicious it was!

Yes, the lion was on the prowl yesterday, and by the sounds of it, still is today too. We don’t have any snow or rain falling, but, 60 kph roaring winds will keep us off the bikes and highway today and safely tucked in here at home.

Whether the lion or the lamb is visiting your area of the country today, I hope your life is enriched with the flavour of gratitude and you have a delicious day.

Guest Room

Some of you know that AC and I got ourselves into a bit of a muddle trying to redecorate our guest room. AC's back went out when the room was only half done and my back wasn't up to much more than his was. You can read AC's account here.

I usually ask for Butterfly's help with decorating ideas, but seeing as this was to be a surprise for her, I couldn't do that this time. I shared some of my trials and tribulations encountered along the way with Iona over at Circles and Squares and she suggested colours and accent ideas that I really liked. So, thanks Iona for some great ideas, and thanks to the painter who came and helped us finish the job. I think it turned out really great. It is now a fresh, clean, relaxing, inviting, guest room done in shades of pale blue and accented with white. Quite a change from what it used to be - three white walls, one red white and black wallpapered wall, black furniture and red accents.

Butterfly was really surprised when she saw it and loved it too. I don't have anything on the walls yet, but these pictures will give you an idea of what it looks like now. Thanks for all your help across the miles Iona.


one

two

Better late than never!

Ahh, here she is. A day late, but that is ok, at least she is making an appearance. The gentle lamb toddled into my world this morning and her bleating could be heard loud and clear on the quiet calm air. The lion might be rambling and roaring somewhere off in the distance, but for this morning, the lamb rules here in my corner of the world.

I hope the gentle lamb visits your corner of the universe today too and you enjoy some sunshine and warm breezes. Mmmmmm, don’t you just love the first touch of spring? I think this might be a day to head out for a spin on the bikes. Yahoo.

Have a great weekend. Talk to you all later.